BLOGGING ON A THRU-HIKE

I keep waking up super early in the morning lately with content ideas all of a sudden! Maybe bc it's hiker season, and I'm just getting so envious of all the hikers this year. I started asking for bloggers that I can follow this season. I want to live vicariously through these people. They know exactly what I went through last summer, I couldn't be more excited for them and can't wait to read about what they think about everything! Sharing honestly, the good, the bad, and the ugly is so important. I tended to share more of the raw things in my blogging with the readers who actually cared and Instagram updates were more short and surfacy. So many people follow blogs bc it was something they never were able to do and reading these experiences is all they have. I know that it's quite impossible to even find words to explain what a thru-hike is even like, but blogging is the best way we share even a glimpse of what it was like on a daily basis. So I want to tell those who plan on blogging this year, YOU MUST DO IT AND YOU MUST NOT GET LAZY AND STOP. And if you can help it, please blog daily. You will not regret it and it will be worth all extra time you spend writing after a long day, uploading in town and not socializing with anyone.

You pretty much become attached to your phone. Photo by: Nate/Meg

I went into my hike hoping to blog but didn't want to make any promises. And I made sure of that so that I wouldn't let anyone down that was reading at home. My friend Jeff Marsh was texting Jenny while we were out hiking the first 2 days and he said something that stuck with me that changed my whole mindset on writing.

"Can you please encourage Wang to journal the entire trip, even if it's just a sentence or two a day. It's so important that she does so that she won't forget the journey. It will last for generations. And tell her I'll be mad if she doesn't haha. Have fun!"

So that night, day 2 at Lake Morena, I started taking notes but realized my notes turned into an hour of writing where I needed to separate out my days. Then I just started making it a daily thing to write every night before bed, even though I was so exhausted (I'll share my process below). The more you make it a routine habit, the easier and normal it gets, like brushing your teeth or packing up camp. I actually really enjoyed skimming through a few other hikers' blogs who were ahead of me. The daily blogs were the ones I LOVED reading through bc they just went through something that I would be doing and having all that detail was really helpful. My most favorite to read was Claudia's blog. She is so hardcore and loved all of her posts with photos. Photos are a MUST. I also liked seeing where Nate and Meg were on trail and if we'd ever reconnect. It always made me kinda sad to see the new friends they were making and how much fun they were having without me haha.

Multitasking: eating and blogging, jk. Photo by: Nate/Meg

My website is through Squarespace. Aesthetically, I love all of it. Customizing your layout is really difficult without adding some CSS, but for blogging, it's not exactly the best. I would recommend a WordPress if you don't have an established domain already set up. I only went through SS because all of my content is already here and it just looks nicer put together. I think I only discovered they have an app just a few days before I left, so I did end up using that to transfer my notes into but it's SUPER buggy

All my daily entries in my notes app.

This is where I write my entries with title and day number.

MY PROCESS ON TRAIL:

1. Every night after dinner before bed, I would write that day's entry in my notes app. I would write for about 30-45 min around 9-9:30pm. These writings mostly were "action" things aka what I did during the day. I would try to write about what I felt/what I was thinking, but it's extremely hard to think of these things when you're so tired. Blogging is very exhausting after a long day, mark my words.

2. If I was literally TOO exhausted and fell asleep while writing after a sentence or two, I would write about the previous day during lunch so I could catch up. I made sure to always do it the next day so that I wouldn't get behind. Once you get behind, that's when you'll slowly slack off on blogging thus making it easier for you to quit altogether.

3. In town, there usually is terrible wifi. But once you find really good internet, that's typically a good place to plant yourself there for a good 3-4 hours. However, there's also always a million errands to do first: laundry, shower, resupply, organize, eat, catch up social media, etc. This is why blogging becomes an extra (very timely) chore in town and why I totally get why people stop blogging early on. It's a lot of work and takes a lot of discipline. Usually, when people are socializing or going out somewhere, I'll just plant myself somewhere so I can catch up on blogs.

4. I transfer each day's entry from my notes to my SS app. Then I upload multiple photos to that day. Side note: I usually edit that day's photos the same night I write that entry so that I don't need to edit in town (another time commitment). I proofread my blog (just once is all I can handle) while the photos are uploading. Then I drag each photo in between the text. I'm all about things looking nicely put together, okay? :) When the wifi is bad, the photos don't load and it's really annoying. Sometimes the app crashes and I lose everything. That's also really annoying.

5. I do that for as many entries I can get in before heading out of town. I schedule them daily to post so that my subscribers can get their emails sent out every morning. I was about 7 days ahead of what was being sent out. I kinda liked how it was not in real time. I had a separate FB group of close friends where they knew exactly where I was on trail.

6. Just do this every single day for 123 days. ;) Only wished I could've made it to the end to write about what the walk to the Nothern Terminus is like, knowing that is your last day on trail and finally coming to an end to something you've worked so hard to do.

All of my blogs scheduled out on my SS app.

I transfer from notes to this page, little formatting options on the app.

Blogging was seriously the best decision I have ever made. I love reading back through each entry and I can literally picture in my mind what that day looked like. I remember it so clearly bc I have those words and photos from that day. Even though we are just walking every day, SO much happens and you can't physically remember all of the details. Granted, there are some days in NorCal where nothing really happens except walking. Blogging, for yourself, to remember that experience of a lifetime, will be worth all of the extra effort.

THINGS I WOULD CHANGE NEXT TIME:

1. Note all of my beginning and ending mile marks with the mileage I walked for that day. I knew how much I did that day in my head and on some, could do the math but wished I would've written down exact mileage each day.

2. Used more interesting titles instead of just mileage and location.

3. Wrote more about what I was thinking/feeling in the moment, but like I said up there, really hard to do when you're so tired.

4. Took more photos of people, signs, anything and everything.

5. Encouraged all the other hikers around me who gave up blogging to keep doing it. :)

I was talking to Jeff this morning, and he encouraged me to make a book of my blog in a hard copy. I thought it was a brilliant idea. I keep finding myself at random times reading back on my old blogs, and I get sucked in and get all nostaglic.  I'll do some edits and have a designer make my layout. :) I think that may just be my next project once I complete the trail. Can't wait!

PART 2 | NIGHT PHOTOGRAPHY 101

Okay, this is where I will actually share what I've learned/done with night photography since the majority of questions are about shooting at night. I didn't think my other post would be so long! I enjoyed going through some of my really old photos...it just shows me how important photography is so many years later! I'll try to keep this post as simple, basic and organized as possible. I find that it's really important to learn and teach from other people--it's the only way we will ever grow in our field and master our craft. On top of that, just practicing. Lots of trial and error and getting out there to shoot over and over again.

Paul Zizka, everybody.

First and foremost, I have learned everything I know about night photography from this man. If you don't already know his work, you should go look asap. I followed his stuff for quite awhile. He lives in Banff, AB with his family and basically shoots everything there (now elsewhere in the most remote and darkest places of the world). I was drawn to all of his beautiful mountain and Aurora Borealis photos; I would look through his portfolio for hours. In 2013, I was clicking around his website and saw that he was offering a workshop in Banff. I immediately texted Jenny and told her we had to do it. Dorothy had always wanted to go there as well, so the three of us decided we were going to make it happen. I emailed Paul and the next thing we know, J, D and I were booked to take his workshop up in Banff!!

Me and D at Moraine Lake, taken by Jenny.

My dreams were finally coming true and becoming a reality. Nowadays, all of his workshops are usually sold out by the time you look and are teamed with his colleague, Dave. Paul absolutely loves teaching, and I can't emphasize how much you can learn at a workshop. There is nothing like watching someone you look up to, do what they love first hand, and actually practicing the techniques and skills in the field. Best of all, it's with people who are just as passionate as you are, it's SO much fun and an experience you will never forget.

GEAR: 

As much as I hate talking about gear, it does play in big part in photography but it's not just a fancy camera. Photographers love when people tell them, "Your camera takes such good photos!!" It's a really huge compliment. Because I was shooting weddings, I already had the majority of gear that I needed for landscape/night photography, but you don't really need anything specific. Just an SLR and wide lens that stops at least to 2.8. I'm going to assume most of you that will read this in detail understand aperture/shutter/ISO, so I won't go into detail about those. A lot of it is self-taught and you can google it all. I also decided to sign up for Amazon Affiliates, bc why not?

This is the stuff I started out in weddings that would work well with night photography:

Nikon D800 body, I think it's discontinued but they have a new D810 now. Basic full frame, I only chose Nikon because I have been used to it for so many years and understand their system.

Nikon 24mm 1.4, never cheap out on a lens. Good glass is worth the investment and will make all the difference. 24mm is wide enough on a full frame and works just fine.

MeFOTO Roadtrip tripod. Always get a tripod with a ball head, don't settle for anything else. The Roadtrip is pretty basic, it's 3.6 lbs but I hadn't started backpacking yet. Perfect if you have a car to drive to your location.

That was basically it and all that I took to Banff. I'll put all the gear under this section so that it's organized, and I will talk about technique after this.

So after shooting with the 24mm for awhile, it was cool but I wanted something wider. I wanted more sky. I looked into a lens that was wider but also two in one. As much as I hate zoomies (primes forever), I didn't want to lug around two lenses every time I went out overnight. Because this was a zoomie, I had to sacrifice aperture and a teeny bit of quality. I can just always tell when it's not as sharp as a prime. :( I opted for the NIkon 17-35mm 2.8. This is my current lens I use now on weekend, short overnighters. I do have to shoot at a higher ISO than my 24mm but the wide is just so good, no distortion.

I then decided to dump my big tripod bc it was too heavy. it wasn't worth it anymore for me to carry around as dead weight bc some nights it was too cloudy and I didn't even try to take any night pics. So I found this little guy, the JOBY GorillaPod SLR Zoom. Let me just say, this tripod is fine and gets the job done. Yes, I have to basically lay on the ground and shoot from my stomach but hey, it works.

My most frequently asked question: what did I carry on the PCT?

This cute little-hidden gem, Canon EOS M w/22mm lens. Huge thanks to my friend Ozzie for the recommendation. I basically ordered this off Amazon, got it in the mail 5 days before I left for San Diego and never used the camera until I was in southern California. Never had time to test it out nor see how the editing worked. I can't believe I was almost not going to bring a camera on trail. What was I thinking?! I just didn't know anything about mirrorless, didn't have time to do any research and didn't want to spend like $1k on another camera. I opted for the 22mm bc portraits were important to me and this stopped down to f/2, yay. Btw, I never took any night pics on the PCT (still regretting) but one night I woke up in the desert while cowboy camping and saw so many stars. I tried figuring out how to infinity focus and just couldn't get it, so I gave up bc everything was blurry. I loathe blurry pics, ya'll.

TECHNIQUE:

Match the line up to the inifinity mark to focus.

So I think the basics of night photography is just figuring out technique and focusing. You want to set your camera on infinity focus. You MUST line that line up perfectly with the infinity mark to be in focus, set it to manual and don't move it. All of your stars in the sky will be focused, and that's it. There are other ways to focus if you have subjects, but that's the main rule of thumb.

I always like to shoot as wide as possible. You usually have to bc it's so dark out. The widest I'll ever go (and can) is 2.8, and I typically will always leave the shutter open for 30 seconds. I like it longer so that my ISO can be lower. Usually, that can be anywhere from 400-6400, it just depends if the moon is out or if you have light in other areas. For composition, just make sure it's straight and the mountains you want are in the frame--that's always a good place to start. There are tons of youtube videos and tutorials online about this stuff, so watching some it beforehand could be helpful.

RESEARCH:

Before I head out on an overnighter, I always do my research (unless I'm lazy). I look up all my moon and sun times here and write them down on a sheet of paper. I usually write down the times for the day after and before I'm out to have a better idea. It's just good to know around what time the sun/moon will be rising. Sometimes if I plan on taking intervals, I'll google some websites and write down some exposure times to practice with bc I don't know what I'm doing. It's nice to have notes on hand bc we don't have internet in the wilderness. It's also good to research locations. You want to choose any area without light pollution, though some glow from afar can look really pretty. And if there's a possible northern lights show, you best be researching the forecast.

THE HARD, PHYSICAL PART:

So in order to get to these really beautiful remote locations, you need to hike out with all of your heavy camera gear. It's always worth it in the end, always. The higher you climb, the better the stars, the better the peaks. The hardest part will always be having to crawl out of your tent in the middle of night, especially in 12-degree weather. Pack extra layers for when you come out bc you'll be frozen while you're idling when you shoot, so it gets cold fast. I set an alarm for every 2 hours usually from 11p-4am to get up, depending on what the sky is doing. I like to shoot before and after the moon comes out. That's why it's nice to have the times on hand so I know when to come out or not. Sometimes if it's overcast, I will just peek outside and see if there are any stars. If not, I'll let out a sigh of relief and go back to my warm bag. And if the sky is unpredictable, sometimes I'll go set up my tripod somewhere and set intervals for throughout the night and hope at least something comes up. I'll check it in the morning, hoping the wind/some animal didn't knock it over, but the lens is usually fogged up most of the night.

Me shooting in Banff lit by moonlight. This is basically what night shooting is like: waiting around for your camera to take pics while you sit in a million layers, not very glamorous. Photo by Jenny.

COMING HOME AND EDITING:

I also believe post-processing plays a huge part in photography. I didn't learn how to edit until I was in college and was forced to learn it bc that was the standard for getting photos compatible with print. I always never liked editing and was annoyed when all the young people I met who got into photography with digital were these tech savvy Photoshop pros. I just couldn't keep up with the new technology. But please shoot in RAW, always. It really makes a huge difference in quality and adjustment in the end. My favorite part is coming home and loading all the photos on my computer. There's so much to see and bring back once you're at the screen. I love how every trip is always a surprise, you literally never know what you're going to get that night! So much fun. For software, I edit all my raw images in Lightroom. For presets, I use a combination of VSCO and Priime. I also believe creating a style of your own that portrays your personality is important. Who cares if someone else doesn't like it, as long as you think it looks good in your eyes, it's all that matters. Editing night skies is fun bc you can adjust colors to your liking and play around with the white balance and tint.

EXAMPLES:

I think it's really hard to learn how to do these things without going out and trying it out over and over again until you get the hang of it, but I wanted to share some images and its data. I'll try to add variation so you can see the difference on exposures. Hopefully, it's helpful!

Paul in Two Jack Lake in Banff, AB. Nikon D800, 24mm, f/2.2, 10 sec, ISO 1600.

Dorothy at Bow Lake in Banff, AB. Nikon D800, 24mm, f/1.4, 30 sec, ISO 800.

Gothic Basin. Nikon D800, 24mm, f/2.8, 30 sec, ISO 400.

The Enchantments. Nikon D800, 17mm, f/2.8, 30 sec, ISO 3200.

Blanca Lake. Nikon D800, 85mm, f/8, 9 min, ISO 800.

Camp Muir at Mount Rainier. Nikon D800, 17mm, f/2.8, 30 sec, ISO 3200.

Artist Point at Mount Baker. Nikon D800, 17mm, f/2.8, 30 sec, ISO 1600.

Paradise at Mount Rainier. Canon EOS M, 22mm, f/2, 30 sec, ISO 800.

Paradise at Mount Rainier. Canon EOS M, 22mm, f/2, 30 sec, ISO 800.

CONCLUSION:

Okay, I hope that was informative and helpful. I know there's SO much more detail and specs to get into, but it's really hard typing them out. I just wanted to touch on the basics, and you can't really learn unless you get out there to try it out! Please, please ask me questions. I'm thinking maybe someday I should lead a backcountry workshop in western WA and actually work with people where we can shoot together. Photography is one of those things where you have to learn by doing. Let me know if you'd like me to address another topic that would be helpful. Until next time!

**This post contains affiliate links

PART 1 | PHOTOGRAPHY TIMELINE

First of all, thank you to everyone who has ever taken the time to reach out to me about photography. I figured it was finally time to blog about this subject. I get asked lots of questions all over the board and wanted to address the basics! I hope it will be helpful for everyone who feels so passionately about photography and wants to learn more. I'll share a little about where I got started. I've been shooting for half of my life (15 years) and I feel there is still so much to learn, always.

My very first camera. Dispoable forever. <3

2002:

I first got into photography when I was a sophomore in high school. However, I was never that "dark room girl." I tried developing my own film, but it just wasn't really for me. Yeah, it's cool to do your own push/pull process but I was like "Meh, it's too dark in here, my eyes can't see." I started shooting with disposable film cameras, my favorite was the Kodak because you can hold the button down and do no flash! It was my go to camera when I went to a bunch of shows. From there, I learned that getting close up to the subject really helped make the photos interesting aka just get into the mosh pits and shoot from wherever.

Taking Back Sunday

Saosin

2004:

After going through dozens and dozens of plastic cameras, I decided it was finally time for me to step it up and get a 35mm point and shoot, I think I got a Canon something and started shooting random things I saw.

This was a mannequin at Nordstrom's at the mall haha.

Some wall at the Houston Aquarium.

2005:

It was time to step it up again and finally got my 35mm SLR, it was a Nikon N75. Nikon forever. It was autofocus, so it was super fast and easy to use. I brought it to more shows and really loved being able to use an SLR.

Portugal. The Man

Circa Survive

Abstract things like chairs at the laundromat. I discovered I really liked slide film for the vivid colors.

2006:

I had a whole roll of film not turn out after a show and was really upset and decided it was time to go digital. This was a very big deal in life. Digital cameras were REALLY expensive back in the day for like 2MP, no joke. It was a huge investment, but my first DSLR was a Nikon D50, it changed my life. I also was really into the fisheye thing (haha). 

More PTM.

I basically went to their every show in TX. Most favorite band to shoot.

Days Away

2007-2008:

Once again, upgraded for the Nikon D80, not really sure why, just did it. I started shooting parties at college (it was thing back then), I joined my college newspaper and did more photojorunalism, and of course, shot more shows. 

At an event of some lady for the newspaper.

RIP old Lone Star Logo

PTM at Emo's in Austin.

Lomography: 

In between all of this, there was this thing called Lomography, if you've never heard of it before, you've truly missed out on life, jk. It was another thing back then, and I had a bunch of their cameras.

This camera is called the SuperSampler. It looks like a toy.

It took pics like this and was super fun but a big waste of money.

Can't forget about those double exposures and shooting over the sprocket holes

Polaroids:

I was also really into Polaroids when they still existed and sold their film. I had a regular one as well as the Polaroid SLR 680, it was amazing. When I found out they were discontinuing the film, I went to Sam's and hella stocked up on packs. And then when I finally ran out of film, that was the end of my instant film obsession.

The Polaroid SLR 680, best instant cam ever.

Jason

Zach

Pink blossoms

White blossoms

Love you, Josie.

When my finger tat used to be so fresh and sharp, now it's just blurry and faded.

HOLGA:

And we can't forget about our beloved holgas, plastic evyerthing. 120vc and light leaks forever.

Can't ever beat that 120N.

BLUE WALL SERIES:

So then I had this thing where I painted my apartment wall blue and did some shoots on it.

Robare as my model, always.

Krystin, my other model.

Then my last year in college, I painted it tourquoise with swirls.

Garrett

Emily

Haley

Ryan

2010:

I registered my photography business and started shooting weddings. I also finally went full frame a few years in. I upgraded for the D700 and then ultimately, the D800. I think the greatest learning curve is when you jump into the wedding industry. I feel like this is where I grew the most in my skills. There is nothing like shooting your first wedding--so many nerves and anxious bones. I truly believe that wedding photographers are some of the most well-rounded photogs out there. They are usually thrown into a high-stress environment and basically have to work with whatever light and situation they have in the moment. There's lots of directing, running around and thinking quick on your feet. I will never forget those nights where my body felt like it had been hit by a train at the end of a wedding day.

Brian and Karen

Eliza and Mike

Chris and Jess

2013:

Then I discovered the backcountry....

Whistler, BC

Okay, I realized this post was way too long, so I will make a part 2 on actual photography tips. Thanks for taking a trip down memory lane with me and looking at all these funny old pics. 

2016 PCT GEAR LIST // POST HIKE

It's always interesting when you start a thru-hike with the gear you think you need, but here's what I actually ended up with. You can look at what I started with here. Each piece weighed separately via lighterpack. I also have a VERY long overview on the bottom. I apologize for not having better photos of my gear or me using it, I'm not very good at asking people to take pics of myself.

Pack weight via lighterpack.com

My beloved Talenti jar that I will keep forever.

Basically all my gear spread out for a cowboying.

Zpacks duplex pitched on the side of the road between Big Bear and Agua Dulce, preparing for the next poodle dog section.

2016 PCT GEAR LIST:

PACKING:

• ULA Circuit lined w/trash compactor bag (2, I double lined my sleeping stuff)

SHELTER:

• Zpacks Duplex

• MSR Aluminum Ground Hog stakes (6)

• Zpacks tiny stakes (2) w/stuff sack

• Zpacks groundsheet poncho

SLEEPING:

• Zpacks 10 degree down bag, reg width/length

• Zpacks ultralight goose down hood

• Therm-a-Rest NeoAir XLite, small w/stuff sack

• GossamerGear Thinlight foam pad - 1/8"

• Sea to Summit Aeros Premium pillow w/stuff sack

• GooseFeet Gear down socks w/stuff sack

COOKING:

• Talenti gelato jar

• Optimus Titanium long spoon

• Zpacks cuben fiber 12.3L Blast food bag

• Opsak 12x20

HYDRATION:

• Sawyer Squeeze

• Smartwater 1L x 2

• Evernew 2L x 2

• Scoop made out of a broken Evernew

CLOTHING PACKED:

• Filson midweight merino wool long sleeve

• Icebreaker Oasis 200 lightweight merino wool leggings

• Town shirt from Prana

• Town shorts from sporting goods store I found in Big Bear

• Injinji toe socks

• Darn Tough ankle socks

• Mountain Hardwear Plasmic Outdry gloves

• Mountain Hardwear Ghost Whisperer no hood

• Patagonia underwear

• Zpacks Challenger rain jacket

• Zpacks cuben fiber stuff sack

SURVIVAL & TOOLS:

• Swiss Army Classic pocket knife

• First Aid - dental floss, bandaids, ibuprofen, benadryl, imodium, triple antibiotic ointment, leukotape, bic lighter, hydrocortisone

• Repair Kit - cuben fiber tape, thermarest repair, tenacious tape, needle

• mini nail clippers

• Deet (only used when bugs were REALLY bad)

• Sharpie

• Map & compass

HYGIENE:

• Normal sized toothbrush

• Toothpaste

• Tooth pick floss

• Eucerin eczema creme

• Sunscreen

• Hand sanitizer

• Vaseline/Body Glide

• Deuce of Spades trowel

• Wet wipes

• Diva Cup

• 1 bandana, 1 pee rag

• Mini Wet hair brush

• Hygiene stuff sack

TECHNOLOGY:

• iPhone 6 w/case

• Petzl Tikka XP 2 headlamp

• Anker 10000mAh portable external battery w/cord

• Dual USB charger for iPhone w/cord

• Canon EOS M

• Canon charger

• 1 extra battery

• SD cards

• Earbuds

• Technology bag stuff sack

OTHER:

• Zpacks wallet - ID, 1 credit, 1 debit, health insurance card

• Sunglasses

• Sea to Summit head net

• Crocs

WORN:

• Columbia national park ranger shirt

• Brooks Epiphany III running shorts

• Icebreaker Sprite merino wool bra

• Patagonia underwear

• Altra Lone Peak 2.5 trail runners w/Superfeet insoles

• Outdoor Research sun hat

• Injinji toe socks

• REI Traverse cork trekking poles

• Wool buff

• Dirty Girl Gaiters

TOTAL BASE WEIGHT (minus food, water, fuel) = 14.15lb

SIERRA/COLD WEATHER:

• BV500 bear canister

• Black Diamond Raven Pro 60cm ice axe

• Hillsound trail crampon

• REI beanie

• North Face fleece

• Girlfriend leggings

By no means is this super UL. Some people I know have INSANE 5 lb base weights. I've learned that I just cannot be one of those people, I need my "luxuries" and comforts. I get cold, I don't like bugs and hygiene is important to me. I've decided my base weight lands in the normal range. Gained 2lbs from my original weight, probably because I added camera gear. At least it's under 15, but ideal UL would be around sub 10 and around 7-8, but who am I kidding?

Duplex holding up in the snow storm.

First storm to hit the duplex.

The only good pic of me in my badass poncho, photo by Nate and Meg.

This is literally my only photo of myself on trail in my lovely ranger outfit (which you can't even see bc the shadow is bad), with my lovely 2lb 9 oz bear can filled with 50 lbs of food.

THINGS THAT I LOVED:

• castle sized tent - I loved sitting in it and there is so much space to lay out all my gear

• groundsheet/poncho - the best of both worlds, giant sized groundsheet for all my breaks and poncho to save me from the rain

• ground hog stakes - SO sturdy

• foam pad - kept my neoair from slipping, extra cushion from the ground, nice sit pad

• down socks - I have a minor case of Raynaud's so it helped keep my toes from freezing at night

• food jar and spoon - best lazy person meal setup, no cooking, food is ready for me to shove into my mouth as soon as I get to camp, no sitting outside to cook with the bugs, if I didn't finish dinner I could eat leftovers for breakfast, sometimes I would soak meals for snacks when I didn't have normal snacks, long spoon is the best

• town clothes - I loved not having to wear your hot rain jacket/puffy or long underwear when doing laundry, I like having something somewhat clean to change into

• MHW gloves - even though they're not insulated, I used them almost every morning packing up and hiking out, the more you move the more it gets warmer

• rain jacket - wore it most mornings when it was chilly, great outer layer for warmth and had nice pit zips

• multitool - the best tiniest thing I carried, I used almost every tool quite frequently, all the blades were super sharp, knife to cut cheese/summer sausage, scissors for just about anything even to keep my mustache trimmed (yes, I'm serious), tweezers to pluck my eyebrows (I started doing it bc I got bored and it's therapeutic)

• nail clippers - used pretty often, another therapeutic thing for me

• cuben fiber tape - used surprisingly often for little tears in my tent, just nice all around repair tape for just about anything

• eternal battery - charged my iPhone super quick, about 4-5 times, needs to wall charge overnight to replenish entirely though

• canon mirrorless - best last minute purchase EVER, worth the weight which isn't even heavy compared to my Nikon

• CROCS!! - always, especially the bright yellow color, basically wore them every time I took off my shoes which is anytime I didn't need to be hiking, ended up using them a lot for river crossings after realizing walking in the water with my shoes was no bueno for me

• my hiking outfit - the $12 running shorts that surprisingly never got a hole in the butt, shirt that made me look like a ranger but also was thick enough to not let mosquitos eat through, I loved the length of and fit, it retained odor easily but whatever

THINGS THAT I SWITCHED OUT MID HIKE:

• got sturdier stakes, the titanium ones kept bending on me, I'm just not gentle enough for UL I've discovered

• the polycro groundsheet was a joke, it's literally like plastic wrap, everything stuck to it and you just rolled it into a ball to pack up (no other way)

• got rid of my tent stuff sack, I ended up just shoving it into the top of my pack

• went stoveless

• dropped all my moment lenses, too much work to switch lenses, always had dirt or condensation on them thus making photo quality bad therefore never used them, became dead weight to carry, I just wanted to pull out my iPhone, take some pics and keep walking, not do this whole screw on a lens every time

• dropped my umbrella in the Sierra, I basically carried it like 800 miles and only used it a handful of times, BUT in those times, it was a life saver with really exposed sections, but in the end it was just annoying to carry and barely used, I might as well just have suffered through those parts which is what I did in northern CA because I didn't have my umbrella anymore

• switched out my original desert shirt when I got to Mammoth because I wanted a new outfit, I didn't really like how it fit-was boxy and short, mosquitoes ate through it easily, all the dirt and stains were more noticeable but didn't smell as bad

• lost my old sun hat somewhere but the brim was becoming too flimsy, I LOVE having a full brim but switched out for a cap in NorCal, which was alright, it got hot fast, looked kinda funny on me

• didn't switch out but good NOTE to have: all your Opsacks and water bladders will break or leak multiple times on trail, make sure to buy several quantities of each so they're ready to ship out when they do break, replacing them became pretty normal or I would carry an extra bladder in case but if I didn't have an extra, I'd carry empty smartwaters which is fine but I don't like the bulk of them for extra carries

THINGS THAT I WOULD RECONSIDER:

• the ULA was good and very durable, but I never really explored other packs before, the circuit hurt my shoulders REALLY bad if I loaded it more than 33ish lbs but that's normal with any UL pack, I'd like to try the Zpacks Arc Haul or Hyperlite in the future

• as much as I love, love my duplex, I'd like to try a freestanding tent (Zpacks now offers freestanding poles that would be fun to try), you really have to find a good wide/flat space to have the perfect pitch and when that happens, it's like a dream castle, I also needed to find good dirt to pitch or else you'd have to get creative with rocks, it was also very difficult to pitch in strong wind

• I would like to also try a quilt next time, my sleeping bag was a bit narrow for me and I felt constricted at times, I dealt with it but it'd be cool to try a quilt

• loved going stoveless but if I made it to WA in the cold rain, I would probably have sent myself my jetboil for warm meals, cold dinners were fine for 1800 miles but I've heard it can really give you a morale boost in WA, it would also expand my dinners to things like mac & cheese (!!!), I couldn't soak pasta so I never ate it on trail which is why I craved it in town almost every time

• clothing wise, I would look into a wind shirt and a puffy from somewhere like Montbell, ghost whisperer was fine but became a pancake and I'm just not quite sure how insulated it actually was...it also was super fragile so I had tears and holes patched up with duct tape all over (once again, I'm not gentle enough for UL), I would also look into a pullover fleece like GB's Melanzana

• for glissading, I kinda wished I had some type of pants to slide on, I would always be in my shorts and didn't have time to change, so I would just slide down and cut up my butt/legs from the snow/ice, I wished I had my girlfriend leggings then bc I could just hike with them and slide just fine

• my headlamp I've had for years and is old but it would be cool to try a lighter USB charging one

• hiking shirt wise, it'd be interesting to try a short sleeve button up, long sleeves get a little annoying with rolling them up

• I would invest in a better quality sun hat, like a Tilley, strong brim that doesn't lose shape with washes

What I wear when it gets colds: Zpacks Challenger rain jacket, Girlfriend leggings, wool buff. AT LEAST I MADE IT TO OREGON!

THE END!!! So long and detailed but I hope it was helpful. I am happy to answer any q's. But basically, gear is whatever and different for everyone. You don't have to have the lightest, most recent gear to thru-hike, some people make it to the end with heavy, bulky REI stuff and that's okay. Don't be a jerk and judge others for not being super UL. In the end, we're all walking the same walk and it doesn't matter what we're carrying as long as we're trying to reach the same destination.

**This page contains affiliate links

WHAT IS NEXT FOR ME?

I decided I would share some things that I've been brainstorming about in this next season for me. My trip did end a month early but maybe I can categorize my plans because I've been doing a lot of thinking about my next steps transitioning back to normal life.

What most of my time is consumed by: sorting through all of my raw images.

WHAT IS MY ANKLE HEALING PROCESS? 

I saw an orthopedist and he referred me to a physical therapist right away. My ankle has been healing well, and I am two and a half weeks out from my initial injury. Basically, I just need to strengthen my ankle again and do the exercises to get me walking. I'm still wearing the boot when I leave the house, but I am able to walk around inside without it. It is only a little bit sore when I bend/rotate my foot in certain ways, but I can definitely tell it's getting way better. My goal for the next few weeks is try to start walking without my boot, then try to walk around Greenlake. If I can walk the lake okay without swelling, I want to go on a practice hike. If that feels good, I'll try to add pack weight. I know it sounds risky, but I'm really hoping that if there are a few weeks left before the season is over, I would really like to do a WA section.  It's a bit optimistic, but I'll just have to play it by ear and see how I'm feeling.

WHAT AM I DOING WHILE I HEAL?

Ever since I've been home, I've been house hopping around Seattle seeing friends. When I first got home, the most productive thing I did the next day was get a new shirt. Sometimes it is overwhelming to be around a big group of new people, but seeing friends that know me well have been really good for me. If I have more than 3 tasks a day, I get really exhausted though. I'm also eating veggies, fruits and salads like everyday. I'm just sautéing them with salt and pepper and it's SO good. Basic things are really yummy. I feel unproductive at times but I have a list of things I'm working towards and it helps me get motivated. I've never really been unproductive and immobile, so it feels a bit strange. I also want to get a trial gym membership, so I can use weights and do the bike or something. I haven't exercised in over two weeks, and I am just dying to move my body. To go from walking 25+ every single day to completely stop doesn't seem healthy. I want to at least do arm things. It is hard not being able to go outside because the weather is so good, so I just stay inside and do my computer things.

AM I CURRENTLY EXPERIENCING ANY POST TRAIL DEPRESSION?

Honestly, I am not sure. I've never really dealt with depression before, so I don't know exactly what that feels like. Basically, I'm just experiencing a lot of FOMO right now. I get really bummed knowing that I would've been walking to the WA border this week. Or I'll look at the clock and see what time it is and in my mind, I know I would be hiking at that very moment or setting up camp or just making it to lunch, etc. Even though I am so stoked to see everyone reaching the Canadian border each day, it's hard seeing photos knowing I will not be making that same walk. Social media probz. But I noticed it's kinda mental for me, and the more I think in those ways, the easier it is for me to mope on it. There's been many great aspects of things happening the way it did.

WHERE WILL I LIVE?

I really hate couch surfing and mooching off people, but I've been staying at friends' places when they're out of town. It's worked out pretty nice, but once they stop going out of town, I will probably go to Issaquah and stay with my sister. I plan on staying with them throughout October to help her with my niece when the new baby arrives. After that, it really depends on where I can afford. I know I can no longer afford a place on my own in the city, so I unfortunately will have to find roommates.

WHAT WILL I DO FOR WORK?

This is probably the most frequently asked question. I know that I do not want to rely on photography solely as my main income anymore. I want to work in the outdoors industry. I want to work with people who are passionate about the trail system. I want to inspire women to pursue their goals and be confident in who they are. I want to encourage and educate the youth on why the outdoors is so important throughout their childhood. I want to continue using my time, energy and gifts to share with others my passion and love for the outdoors and the PCT specifically. Soooo, if I can find something that combines all of those things, then I'm all game.

WILL I EVER HIKE AGAIN?

Duh! This is not a permanent injury, and I will be able to hike again 100%. I just need to make sure I fully heal well before attempting something crazy again. I already loved hiking, but now I am even more in love with long distance hiking. Doing 7-8 mile hikes are no longer attractive to me, jk. I'll do them, but there is something so, so rewarding to me about doing 20+ mile days and getting really far on foot. Depending on my "work" situation next year, I plan on finishing the PCT from Crater Lake to Canada in 2017. But there's something about actually thru-hiking the trail in one shot that's really important to me. Yes, I know the trail will always be there and I can do it in sections, but I would like to attempt to thru-hike the trail again from Mexico sometime before I die. It was a really big commitment and sacrifice this year, so I'm not sure if I would attempt it again in the near future, but definitely before it's too late.

WHAT OTHER LONG TERM GOALS ARE BREWING?

I have always wanted to learn mountaineering for so long, and this fall I plan on taking a basic alpine climbing course. Right now, I'm just trying to figure out which organization to go through. Some of them include rock climbing and I just don't care about that. So, summiting Mount Rainier is my ultimate goal for the next season. I'd prefer to not pay a bunch of money to a guide to take me up, I want to learn all the technical skills for myself before attempting to summit. Then I would attempt a summit with close friends as a small group. I had plans last year to climb Adams, but there was a fire on the weekend I planned on going, so that's also on my list. And I want to climb Mt. Shasta some day if I'm ever back in California. I'd love to do the Wonderland Trail as well. I attempted that the prior year but never got a permit. I do not think I would ever attempt the AT, maybe the CDT if I had a partner...

WHAT WILL THIS BLOG LOOK LIKE IN THE FUTURE?

I think I will continue to share stories on my adventures and keep pushing myself to step outside of my comfort zone. I am currently going through all my photos and editing them. I want to compile it all into my portfolio and share them with all the hikers that I met this year. It's been very nostalgic going back on them, but I'm SOOOO glad I had a real camera with me. I do wish I took more photos, but it was super hard at times to even just take it out of my side pocket. I would go through phases where I would force myself to take a bunch, then I'd go like 5 days with zero photos. I also had to juggle between my iPhone and camera, it would've been nice to designate my camera as the primary in the beginning, but I didn't think of it, oops. 

I am also working on a lot of post trail content with various topics that I want to share with others. Each person experiences the trail in such different ways. I think because I am so not normal, I experienced it very differently than others. Here are some things I want to address:

• thing I were not expecting on the PCT
• things I would do differently
• food, food and food
• gear
• post trail depression
• trail culture
• people
• solo vs group hiking
• mental vs physical challenge
• my highs and lows
• taking care of and listening to your body
• my overall take on the whole thing

Hopefully some of that information will be helpful/interesting to those who are curious about the trail. Thank you to everyone who has been so so supportive and encouraging while I was out there. All of your emails, messages and comments helped me push on every time I got cell service haha. 

A WEEK LATER: BEND

The most amazing Benny I've ever had!  

We headed back through bend and had brunch with some of jennys motorcycle friends. They were super fun and showed us this amazing eggs Benny restaurant. Then we we were back to sisters to the grummers. Clyde missed all of the girls and they missed him! It was a busy morning for them but we all got going late afternoon to go to the lake. We couldn't stay too long bc we were picking up gb at Santiam pass! He texted me when he got to the trailhead and it was a short drive down hwy 20 to get him. I rolled up to the parking lot in Ellie and it was SO weird to be on the other side of things. He looked extremely dirty. And Jenny has been looking forward to finally meet him, so her wish came true. 

Most of our nights w the grummers are like this: snuggling w all the dogs.  

Pia loves Clyde.  

From there, I drove us back to sisters but we stopped at sisters coffee first. Jenny needed to get some work done. She barely had any down time to work so I insisted she get some time away from everyone. Then I took GB back to the grummers for a shower and laundry. All the girls got to meet him and Araiya did mention he smelled haha. Matt lent some clothes to him while his clothes were in the wash. Chris and Alissa were also in sisters so we decided to meet up w them for dinner. We were getting really hungry while the grummers ate dinner so we each had a first dinner of quinoa salad haha. I picked up a game and undercover at sisters inn and we got Jenny on the way. We went to the brewery for dinner. I ordered a huge awesome citrus chicken salad. I'm so happy I want salad everywhere I go. It was such a nostalgic feeling talking about the trail with everyone. I can't believe they all know me so well and we've only just hiked together. I am truly sad to be leaving them. I adore these people so much. 

Chill w dogs.  

"Emmy, go to your man!" - pia.  

After dinner, we met up with the grummers for homemade ice cream at Ali's. I got black licorice and mint chocolate chip. Yum! We got back to the house and hung out for a bit with all the girls and dogs. It was such a full house. I gave Jenny Araiya's bed and I took the couches with GB. It was a late night for everyone! 

Finally got a picture of a game and undercover together!! 

I love you Bebe Clyde.  

Sorting resupply by the deschutes river.  

So many Windell boxes.  

In the morning, we met back up w a game and undercover for breakfast at la magie. I dropped them back off at the hotel and said our official goodbyes. So sad!! Then we took GB into bend to help with his errands. We first took him to trader joes and then some other grocery next door. He had to make all of his Washington boxes so it was a lot to do. Jenny also made me take the enneagram test and found out I was 8: the challenger. And gb was 9: the peacemaker. How spot on. It's still so crazy to see how well we know each other already in a short amount of time. We grabbed some boxes from the po and went to the park next to deschutes river to sort his food. I'm glad we were able to help bc he had five boxes to sort out, label and ship. It was a LOT of work! Then we took him back to the po to drop him off for good. Once again, sad to part ways with the golden boy but this time it was different bc I knew I wasn't coming back. 

Saying good bye to all! 

It was a long drive back to Seattle.  As soon as we crossed the Oregon/Washington border, my emotions hit me again. I was not ready to come home, not yet. I didn't want to. I kept thinking about how I couldn't finish the trail and all of my friends were soon making their way to timberline lodge and finally the bridge of Gods. It crushed me to know I couldn't be with them. I just sat in my sadness and couldn't do anything about it. Then Ellie starting bucking again at 3000 rpm and it distracted me. It got to the point where we couldn't drive over 60mph. It was a very long drive home and Jenny hates going slow. I had a headache and was so tired. 

My Wang balloons. 😹

Cake with my face on it. At least I made it to Oregon!  

We pulled up to Nancy's a little after 930p and walk in. I give her and John a huge hug and see balloons in the shape of my name behind them. Then all of a sudden, a bunch of people come out behind them and I start ugly crying. They all planned a surprise welcome home party for me and waited for me sooo late on a work night. Even with their kids. :( I was so overwhelmed and grateful that they would do this for me. I felt so loved and cared for. I was not ready to come home but I know I have friends who will be here for me when I'm struggling with the transition back to real life.

A WEEK LATER: SHELTER COVE

All the ladies went out to sisters coffee in the morning. The girls brought coloring books and reading books while Natalie, Jenny and I chatted. Then it was off to shelter cove resort. It is the stop between crater lake and bend. We planned on meeting mike and Jackie there and with all of the timing, we were able to catch them there before I went home! I also had some resupply boxes I had shipped myself which now worked out bc I could pick them up. I didn't tell them Jenny was with me so it was gonna be a surprise for them!! 

Pete Brook! Aka sketch.  

Sketchy organizing his food.  

Shelter cove was a super nice boujie resort with boats, docks, store and campgrounds. At night, they had cute twinkle lights framing the store. It was soooo good to see mike and Jackie. We had all met on day one and now I am going home but had Jenny with me. It felt like we've been friends forever. I picked up three of my resupply and gave them to mike and Jackie since they didn't mail a box and were going to hitch into town for it. We hung out under the tent for awhile and Jenny got to see thru hikers in their full trashy glory. We both felt like posers. 

Our campground.  

Jennys hammock.  

We reserved a car camping site for all of us to spend the night. Mike and Jackie took a Nero for us! We went and set up our beds as evening was crawling in. Me on a blow up bed, Jenny in a hammock and mike and Jackie in their tent. We then drove eight miles to the closest town for dinner bc we could. There was literally only one restaurant option here and it was this divey bar. Since we were with hikers, I ordered nachoes made of jojos (potatoe slices). We had some great conversations and laughed at things. I am really going to miss them. Mike and Jackie are probably my favorite couple on trail. I love their sense of humor and are so easy to get along with. I am rooting for them to the end!! They are one of our last friends standing.  

My boot.  

Mike and Jackie.  

Wangie sandwich.  

We drove back to camp and crawled into our beds. The night was quite chilly, especially with no insulation. I actually woke pretty frozen and took awhile to warm up. We said our goodbyes and I drove them back to the trailhead. First time to see my friends walking away from me to finish what I also planned on doing but couldn't. It was sad but I am proud of them and know they will make it to the end. 

Shelter cove in the morning. So pretty.  

A WEEK LATER: SISTERS

One of the most important people I wanted to meet up with was the grummers. I know them from Seattle and they moved to sisters earlier this spring. They have three girls and have been waiting for me all summer to walk to them. I was so bummed to arrive to their house via car with a broken ankle. I was SO close with only two stops away and just didn't make it. :( 

My delicious roasted veggies and egg with sprouts! 

Lisa and I drove back to bend after PCT Days and met back up with rusty. It was my first time seeing him since Kennedy meadows! It's been a reaaaaally long time. He told us about jacksons corner and we all had brunch there. It was so yummy, fresh and healthy! I can't eat junk food anymore. After that, I dropped Lisa and Rusty off at Safeway and we parted ways. Sad to say goodbye but was really glad I got to see them before I went home. Then I was en route to sisters.  

Said goodbye to Lisa and rusty!  

I pulled up to the grummers house and was greeted by Natalie, tallis, Araiya, pia, Matt and Emmy. It was so great to be surrounded by kids! It's been too long. They let me stay in Araiya's bed and we had a delicious salad and steak for dinner. Then we went to downtown sisters for froyo! It was so fun and delicious. They also drove me to the neighborhood where their house is currently being built. Sisters is so beautiful. I can totally see why they all love it here. 

Hammock in backyard with good light.  

Pia, Tallis and Araiya.  

Me and the ladies.  

Konnie and I.  

The next day, I drove back to bend to drop my rental off at hertz. I met up with a gal named konnie who has been following my blog and is also John spears' cousin! What a small world. She was SO sweet and wonderful to talk to. She picked me up at hertz and we got a yummy lunch. Then Jenny pulled up in Ellie with Clyde!! So happy to see them. It doesn't feel like it was four months since she last dropped me off at the border. Everything flew by so incredibly fast. We hung out for a bit and visited a moto coffee shop. She told me Ellie has been jerking when she goes a certain rpm and her check engine light went on. I checked the code and we put more oil in. It seemed as if the oil had been burning off during the long drive to Oregon. She ran alright back to sisters. 

Clyde and Jenny came from Seattle.  

We all had another yummy dinner with the grummers. Each night we seem to be growing in numbers. Having a full house is quite fun. ​

Love these girls.  

A WEEK LATER: PCT DAYS

So I stopped writing daily notes after I received the news about my fracture but I wanted to make some new posts since a lot happened the week after I left Medford.  

I had brainstormed a ton of different things I wanted to do before I had to go home. I was talking to Jenny and since she seems to always come up with the craziest ideas, she offered to drive my car down to Oregon and pick me up. Everything seemed to all fall into place after that. I wanted to go to PCT Days, an annual event that takes place in cascade locks where a bunch of vendors, organizations and hikers come together for a weekend. I have heard it can get a little crazy but there were some people I had been wanting to meet for awhile and it was a great opportunity finally. I decided to make everything happen. 

The pretty drive towards bend.  

The morning I left Medford, Lori took me to the hertz rental where I rented a car for the weekend. I tried holding back some tears as I said goodbye. The hansons have been a huge blessing to me these last few weeks and I don't know what I would've done without them. My rental was finally ready and I sat behind the wheel for the very first time in four months. I drove three hours to bend with no glasses but I made it safely. 

Such a fancy restaurant at spork.  

I met up with Lisa and nick at spork, this Asian/Mexican fusion restaurant that had like 500 reviews on Yelp. It was so yummy. It was so great to see them both! It had been so long. We caught up and drove click (nick) to the po to pick up his boxes. Bend is really spread out so doing errands is very hard there. Lisa had said she walked like seven miles just around town the day before. Then we dropped off click at their hotel. 

Click!  

It was evening by the time we were en route to cascade locks, the last town before the border and another three hours away. The drive was really beautiful. We had views of mt hood and Adams the whole way. As we rolled through hood river, we picked up some hikers but was caught in bad traffic due to road construction. It took over 45 min to go four miles. We dropped the dudes off at the gas station when we arrived in town and got to my friend ash's house. She thru hiked last year and ended up getting a job in hood river and moved to cascade locks. Ash let us crash at her place for the night. It was so cool to see her this time around bc I last saw her before I got on trail and now I had semi thru hiked when I saw her again. 

Mt hood heading towards cascade locks.  

Lisa and I with smokey. 

In the morning, we walked over to the park where PCT Days was. It was still early but lots of people were out visiting all the booths. I finally got to meet the Zpacks guys! It felt like we all knew each already. They were so great. Lisa and I wandered around all the different booths and got free things. Then we also got to meet Jack Haskel! He works for PCTA and knows gb. We have this ongoing joke about "his buddy jack" so it was so funny and great to finally meet him! The rest of the day we basically just wandered and loitered around. I went back to the Zpacks booth and ended up hanging out with Matt and will for most of the afternoon. I met back up w Lisa and ash for a bit but I called it a day around eight. I was socially exhausted and wanted to go to bed. 

Met sterling at the event.  

Lisa!  

With Jack Haskel!

Selfie with Jack that we had sent to our group text. 

PCTA were doing some cross cutting.  

Matt and will from Zpacks. 

I slept outside on the deck with the cool air and wind.  

Ash and her sweet dog Shasta.  

More dogs at the event.  

DAY 123: THIS IS THE END (FOR NOW)

Today is my four month anniversary and it would've been the beginning of my fifth month on trail.

First time I was wheeled away in a hospital bed!  

I am up early bc of my hiking body clock. Amye comes over in the morning and takes a look at ankle and wraps an ace bandage around it. I think we all already knew I will need to get an X-ray. Lori takes me to the Asante hospital ER. Everyone there is so friendly and knows about the trail. I get taken care of right away. This was the very first time I've ever been wheeled around in a hospital bed and the first time ever getting an X-ray that wasn't of my teeth. I accidentally left all my id and insurance cards at home but Doug was able to get all the info to Lori for me. The nurse comes back with my X-ray and tells me I have an avulsion fracture. A small chip in my bone that has been pulled apart by a tendon. So yes, it is a small break. The nurse tries to call an orthopedist to see if there is a brace I can use to hike on but it is not possible. Basically, it is my time to come home.

The avulsion fracture in my ankle.  

My new walking boot is amazing.  

I just don't think it would be wise to try to hike on a semi healed ankle and further risk the fracture. In fact, I wouldn't feel comfortable doing it. I've taken care of my body since I began. I never over pushed myself on big miles where I incurred pains and always listened to my body. It is all so hard to take in right now and it saddens me that I've made it this far and still haven't seen the best of Oregon and Washington. I was the last person to think this would happen so early on, but this is life and God already had this written for me. I am so grateful of everything that has happened in these past four months: pushing through my hard days, being super emotional, hiking Northern California solo at my lowest point, challenging my body to the limits, eating the worst processed food ever, facing my biggest fears, meeting some of most amazing people that will be friends for life and having an experience I will never forget. This was by far the most insane thing I have ever done. I still can't even fathom I even went through with it. I never once wanted to quit and told myself the only thing that would take me off trail is an injury. I truly believe I would've been able to finish. I just know it. I am grateful it happened the way it did, and it's just another reminder that life is never going to go the way you've planned it.

After the ER, Lori took me to Dutch Bros to get a smoothie. Then we stop by Bria's house to visit. I got to meet their dog Sophie. So sweet. We broke the news to Doug back at home and I took the rest of the afternoon breaking the news to friends and family. It was a lot harder than I had imagined. Very emotional to say the words "I have to come home." Gb called me from the highest point in or/wa and I cried on the phone with him. Even though I know I'm not a failure, I feel like I've failed. It's just so hard to take in and everything changed so suddenly. It was a long and crazy day.

DAY 122: MILE 1809.6 TO MEZAMA AT CRATER LAKE

First morning after. Toes insanely huge.  

Left leg swelling.  

We set our alarms for thirty minutes later at 430a so we hike out in the dark for a slightly shorter time. I looked at my foot and the swelling had been pushed down to my toes. They were HUGE! The only thing to do was to finish this 9.8 miles out to crater lake. I got emotional in the morning, thinking to myself, "I just have to hike these nine miles out to crater lake and I'll be ok." I also thought about how scared I was going to be starting back solo again. We reach a ridge and I text Lori about my injury. We start off slow but I pick up the pace once I get the miles in. Maybe bc I'm extremely motivated to get there by this point. We have our last break before the final push and GB made me read my blog post from yesterday, I almost teared up reading it.

My feet looked crazy by the time I reached Mezama. 

Hands were SO dirty.  

The bruising.  

We finally reach the crater lake hwy. I see a kid at the trailhead and ask if he's going into Mezama and he is not so we do the .5 mile road walk to the guardrail trail. It is quite painful on my feet and very hot. We get to the side trail off the road and GB tells me it's very steep. Like VERY. It's a straight drop off basically on loose dirt. My foot cannot bend in that way. GB says he will take my pack for me and hikes down first and climbs all the way back up and takes my pack down. Ugh. Why is he being so good to me?! I was so blown away with all that he's already helped me with in the last few days. I really hate accepting help, but I had no other choice other than to let him help me. I have never been so happy to see Mezama village. We get there and I immediately rip off my shoes to a huge swollen foot. The swelling was still pushed to my toes so I took off the tape and it started dispersing back to the ankle.

My friend Whitney from Portland left me snacks when we she at crater lake just a few days before me.  

There were so many things I wanted to do: shower, pick up my boxes, eat, elevate my foot. But I couldn't do all. GB calmed me down and called Lori for me from the restaurant. Apparently she wasn't able to get my text from this morning so it was the first she's heard of what happened. She told him she would be at crater lake in a few hours to come get me. What an amazing lady. I went and picked up my boxes. All of them arrived except for Nate and Meg's. New shoes, socks, water filter and resupply. Even snacks from an old friend who was just at crater lake a few days ago. As I was getting stuff done, I hear my name and it's a game and undercover!! I was sooo happy to see them. It's been too long. They were getting dropped off in a nice convertible. I give them a huge hug and they were also so happy to see GB. They hadn't seen him since the sierras.

They all squished into the back of the car. 

We then all go have lunch at the restaurant. I order the salad bar and pile a huge plate of goodies. We catch up and I am surrounded by some of my favorite hikers. We are finally all together at the same time and I am bummed I will not be continuing on with them to walk the rim. I head back to Mezama in case Lori shows up. The sun is out and it is hot. I lay in what shade I could find and elevate my foot on a wall. Lori pulls up and she gives us the biggest hug. She has literally saved me. Everyone seems to be done w their resupply so Lori gives a game, undercover and gb a ride to the rim village and so that I could finally see the lake for the very first time. The lodge had a observation deck with rocking chairs that overlooks the lake. It was breathtaking!! We were all so happy and sat on the chairs and looked out at the view for a bit. I take my pictures with everyone and then it was finally time for me to say goodbye. What a sad moment to leave all your best trail buddies.

Gb and Lori.  

Undercover and a game.  

Lori and I make the drive all the way back to Medford. What a strange feeling to be leaving the trail. For an injury that was out of my control. We stop by the natural food store to pick up some arnica gel and Epsom salt. We get back to the hansons and it feels weird to be back since I was just there last week. I get back into the soft bed just as I remembered and I feel at home. I finally take a shower and feel better. I have dinner with Doug and Lori and we talk life. Always meaningful conversations with them. After dinner, my foot looks insanely huge. Probably bc I was sitting for so long. I hurry to bed so I could elevate. What a long day, I pass out immediately.

Lori and I.  

One of my fav couples.  

Trail besties for life.  

DAY 121: MILE 1790.2 TO 1809.6

The most amazing sunrise I saw as I cried in pain.  

Well today is a day I will never forget. I snooze for twenty minutes since I camped alone. A bunch of hikers pass me in the dark and one was GB. I was glad to see him so soon since we didn't camp together last night. I told him to go ahead without me.

So pretty.  

I hike out in the dark and cross a giant blowdown and stepped on a thin layer of wood. It broke beneath my left foot and I fell three feet into the hole between the two blowdowns. I cried in pain and was stuck, pinned down by my pack. It was dark and I was completely alone. I finally regained my composure and pulled myself out. I started walking and the pain in my ankle became more excruciating. After about ten minutes, I stopped on a ridge and sobbed uncontrollably. I had no idea what to do. I cried out to God asking for guidance and to take away my pain. My ankle was hurting so bad and I could barely walk. I had nobody to help me, it was just myself and my headlamp in dark. I felt so helpless. I considered calling 911 to come save me. I popped some ibuprofen and decided to hike on to try to find GB.

Burned section.  

Gb tapes my foot.  

For the next five miles, I was a complete mess. I cried the whole way thinking of all the different scenarios that would happen. I had thought to myself, "It's all over now, I don't want to go home, I've come so far, I can't go now." I didn't think I could do this next 20 mile dry stretch. What if I can't find gb since I'm so slow? I was so scared to be so helpless by myself. This fast hiker passes me while I am bawling my eyes out and I ask him to tell the boy in yellow pants that I had hurt my ankle pretty bad and am now going slow. He was so kind even though I think he didn't know what to do with this random girl crying on the trail. I finally make it up the long hill and find GB waiting for me. By now, my ankle has swollen greatly. My amazing hiking partner then tapes up my ankle and tells me he will help me carry my water through the dry stretch. He stays with me the entire time and waits for me at junctions. He carries out 2L of my water totaling his carry to 6L making his pack weight insanely heavy. I soak my foot in what was our last cold stream until the dry stretch.

Some other views.  

Soaking my foot in one of the last streams.  

At lunch, we discover my ankle is starting to bruise heavily and is still very swollen. Every time I stop and start back up again, the pain is very bad. I didn't think I could make it the whole way to crater lake. I then push on making it close to 20 miles into camp. We stop just about nine miles shy of the road to the park. We were both so tired and the mosquitos were coming out. This is probably going to be our last night camping together. I have this feeling I won't be seeing GB at all again for the rest of this trip. It's just so hard catching up to people and I will be a good amount of days behind now. I am scared and sad to be on my own again and probably in a wave that is super behind. It's going to be tough to get back again with no one I know. I always sit in my tent when we do dinner and GB comes over and cooks outside by my tent letting all the mosquitoes eat him. We reminisced on some of our favorite memories and I read him an excerpt from my blog from the desert days when I last read to him, making everything full circle. I am really bummed to be splitting up again. It's like losing a friend and having to start fresh again out there. It took us so long to finally meet back up again after the sierras and we've only done like 300 miles with each other since then. We won't get to reach the Washington border together.

Starting to bruise at lunch.  

This was by far the hardest and most painful stretch I have ever done. So many emotions came all at me once I felt the pain. I have no idea what is to come but I know that I cannot walk on this ankle right now. And who knows for how long. As upset and disappointed as I am, I know that this is out of my control and God has a plan for all of this to happen. I might not know exactly what he is teaching me in this but I will. Maybe he wants to persevere and desperately cling onto him in to walk these next two states. I came to terms to accept that I will probably be a few days behind and might not make it to the end but will walk until I cannot. But mostly, I am saddened that I will have to split with GB once again. Good partners don't come around often and I will now have to go back to solo hiking and hitching. This life is such an adventure and I have no idea what I'm in store for.

Burned section.  

Looking up.  

DAY 120: MILE 1764.7 TO 1790.2

Morning.  

We finished walking the lava rocks this morning. They weren't too bad as the trail was more covered in dirt. I've been having skin irritations lately. Basically anything that scratches or rubs against my skin, it gets raised and forms a weird bump shape. Usually it's from brush, my backpack rubbing or me just scratching. Sometimes even in sitting on the ground can irritate it. It itches but not insanely and it goes back to normal within the hour. My skin has become so sensitive. Im gonna google why it's happening. We've been hearing this section has terrible mosquito swarms so I was nervous all day for them. We ended up taking an early lunch that wasn't near the skeeter area.

The spring that was noted to be mosquito hell wasn't that bad. It was mostly flies and bees. The rest of the day was navigating around tons of blowdowns and being stabbed/scratched from fallen limbs poking out. They are very annoying. The blowdowns covered my entire way until camp. I ended up stopping at the site before our goal but gb never showed up. This is the first time he hasn't made it to our meeting spot. I tried waiting a bit but the mosquitos were coming out and I just wanted to set up camp. I'm now by myself in this huge site. I haven't camped alone in a very long time. I'm a little spooked. I hear a weird animal noise outside but it's mainly crickets. I'm wondering if I should wake up normal time tomorrow or pack up later so gb can catch up. Losing each other kinda sucks.

DAY 119: MILE 1738.7 TO 1764.7

One of the only views of the day.  

So hot and hazy.  

I passed out last night and slept well. Most of today was in the trees and very gradual climbs. Most of the time you couldn't feel it but somehow we were still tired. We are also starting to enter the area with blowdowns. I found a nice place for us to do lunch. I've been eating a lot more this section. Mainly bc my food is good and it is heavy. Gb didn't sleep very well last night. He seemed off today and so was I. Something about being in the trees all day with no views is a little tough.

Trees. Blowdowns.  

Saw this right before lunch.  

Signs.  

So much tagging and protesting.  

The last water source before camp was by a shelter. There was also trail magic there. I also found out there's a dry 20 mile stretch into crater lake. No fun. I headed out since it was getting late. Lots of blowdowns and lava rocks beneath my feet. Ouch. So so painful. It doesn't help that my soles are so flat now. I heard there is seven miles of rocks tomorrow. There also weren't many tent sites but I found one in the woods a bit. I pitched and there were mosquitos already. Gb came. Ever since we left the hansons, I've been missing being around people who actually care about me and know me very well. A southbounder also came and camped with us. It's cool to talk to them about what they just came out of. 

Huge blowdown.  

So sleepy now.

Lava rocks. Ouch.  

DAY 118: MEDFORD TO MILE 1738.7

I finally slept so well last night on the soft bed. So happy. We woke around 530 to pack up. Doug was taking us back to the trail at 630. They have done so much for us already! And this morning he woke up super early to take us. We are so thankful. We said our goodbyes to Lori and thanked her for being our trail mom. I am so sad to leave them now but happy I finally got to see their home in Medford. The morning was cool and felt good but the sun was coming up quick. We stopped by the callahans to go potty. It seems like such a cool place. Will need to check out someday. Doug dropped us off where we hitched from and we gave him hugs. Then we were on our way. We had such a good time w the hansons. So much quality time spent and we felt like their own kids.

Mayo!! The best idea ever.  

Most of the elevation was not bad at all but my pack was super heavy and the weight was putting a lot of pressure on my feet and made it hurt. I had to stop several times before lunch. A southbounder named rob passed us and I knew him from a very long time ago. I shot his wedding back in 2009 and hadn't seen him and his wife since. And now we're both on the pct seven years later! How crazy. We got to talk about each other's section so far and stuff so that was cool.

The rest of the day was just hot and not very many views. I didn't pack enough water for this relatively dry section so that's always sad. Gb gave me what he could spare and I had to ration. We got to our campsite semi lateish and I had the best dinner. I am so happy we got to resupply at tjs. I am looking forward to all my food this round.

DAY 117: ZERO IN MEDFORD

I stayed up way too late last night and when your body clock is 4-5am, it's rough. This bed is so nice though. Doug made us a hearty breakfast in the morning! So good. We then spent the rest of the morning and afternoon organizing food. It took forever. I also found out that my shelter cove box was accidentally sent via usps so I had to redo another box. It's good I caught it now while I'm in a town with a good grocer to ship ahead. Doug let us take the car and we did one last round of dreadful errands. It was back to the Safeway for more food, ups and po.

Unexpected zero day!

We were finally done and my brain was hurting so bad. I told gb that maybe we should stay another night with the hansons and just do a full day in the morning. If we headed out in the evening, it would be so hot and we would only do a few miles. I just didn't feel rested. He agreed and we talked to Doug and Lori about it at the house and what their schedule was like. They were cool with it all so we stayed!! We were so happy w that decision. We ended up dipping in the pool and chilling for the evening. Lori made us pizza and we had some good chats with her over dinner. She's such a great mom and knows the way to our bellies. She always has food set out for us when we start feeling hungry haha. It's like magic.

We are happy.  

I took my last shower and got ready for bed. Doug came home from his concert and we chatted a bit. I am so very grateful for the hansons. They have been so good to us. And they all remind me of Chris so much. He has such a great family and dynamic. They have such a cool history and story. It was also so nice to just be surrounded by people who love the lord. It's been a verrrry long time. It's encouraging.

DAY 116: MILE 1705.7 TO ASHLAND TO MEDFORD

My first Oregon sunrise.  

Woke this morning and was excited for town day!! I was finally able to poop a little in the morning. I've been constipated for two days and it's not fun. The poop has been really dense and it's hard to push out. I miss my soft serve. :( I think I've eaten too much town food or not enough fiber. The ten miles today seemed extra long so I had to put on my music to get me going. The only hiker we saw coming down was spf. The others must've all gotten into town early.

We arrive at the road and see a handful of hikers getting dropped off. Gb saw some of his old friends. Our original plan was to walk to callahans and have Lori Hanson pick us up there but a sweet older couple drove by in their minivan and asked if we wanted to go into Ashland since they just made a drop off. We took the offer since it might make it easier for Lori so we went into town. Our first stop was the po so gb could pick up some boxes. Then we walked over to pony espresso for a small bite. We decided we'd wait for Lori there and do lunch with her. I ordered a smoothie and bagel sandwich since I was so so starving. Everyone in Ashland was really friendly and knew what we were doing so we didn't feel like homeless people. It was so nice to sit and relax.

Thai tea!! 

Soon Lori pulled up! So tall and lovely and she scooped me into her arms to give me a giant hug even though I smelled like sour pickles. It was SO good to see a familiar face after after such a long time. She then took us to Thai near Medford and I ordered a delicious Thai tea and pad see ew. Yay noodles! So yummy. Asian food. Yes. No burgers. After lunch, we went to their house in Medford. It so cool to finally see their place. I remembered when they had first moved up from Sacramento a few years ago and they all really love Oregon now. Lori let me stay in the blue room with this huge comfy bed. The mattress pad is like foam and I sunk into it so softly. It's also the room Chris and Jess usually stay in when they visit. Gb had the room next door which is Doug's tv room haha. So weird to have a random hiker in my friend's family home so I took a pic and sent it to Jess.

Gb on the floor at the hansons. Such a weird sight.  

We got to shower and do laundry. Always so nice. Doug (loris husband) was on his way home early so we all got to chat when he got there. Soon we had to head out for so many errands. Rei, trader joes, Safeway and sports store. Rei didn't have the things I needed :( but tjs was sooo amazing!! It felt so good to get most of our resupply there. I can't wait to have those snacks this week. I mean, I still bought junk food but it's better ingredients haha. It'll be great motivation to get us to crater lake. We surprisingly were able to get most of our snacks there. Safeway was just mainly dinner stuff. So cool. By now, my eyes were SO tired and droopy. Nothing like errands to exhaust you. Last stop was sports store for GB's insoles.

Trader Joe resupply! 

Reminders of friends from home. 

Bria tried giving gb a man bun. Didn't work. Hair too soft.  

We were finally headed home and Doug showed us how to play Pokemon in the car haha. I would totally play in the city. We keep wondering if we're able to catch any on the trail. We get back to the house and were greeted by amye and Bria! These are Doug and loris daughters and Chris' sisters. So happy to see them and love me some girl chats. Lori had already prepared us a delicious dinner when we arrived. We had salad, roast chicken, sweet potatoes, fruit and bread. It feels so good eating well! I miss it so much. We all ate outside by the pool and has a jolly good time. Doug brought out cigar and whiskey for gb. I think they got along just great haha. The hansons welcomed us so well into their home and made us feel like family. I miss things like that. You don't get that much out here.

The guys bonding. 

It was getting pretty late and I was sooo tired. Finally it was bed time but I was organizing a few things that kept me up till after 11. Medford has been an amazing stop.

Lori, Doug, me, Bria, amye  

DAY 115: MILE 1682.8 TO 1705.7

Oregon border!!  

Today was OREGON!! Since I camped away from gb last night, I got packed and walked over to him down the trail where he was camped. I was a bit early so I sat looking up at the stars while I waited for him. It was a chillyyyy morning. Jackets and gloves all on. I even wore my gf leggings. We passed tons of other campers. I was wide awake and ready to get to the border. It was a gradual hill up to the border. The whole time we were getting closer, I kept looking at every tree wondering if that was the one. We get to the border and I let out a squeal. There's a sign with the mileage left and a trail register. We flip through the pages looking at all the people who have come through. Gb takes his last pee in California and I eat my last snack. We break and take some pics but it gets chilly quick. I hike on.

Gb signing the trail register.  

As soon as I start hiking in Oregon, I got lazy. I just wanted to sit on top of the ridge sharing my border pic and texting my friends from home. I walked slowly to the water source and was bombarded with a million hikers and day hikers. I was also starving. I guess I was hangry bc the slack packers were smoking, being so loud and talking about getting wasted. I was irritated and quickly made some unappetizing cold mashies. Then I was off. I put on some new found glory and all of a sudden, I was in such a good mood! The landscape started to change and it was beautiful. I finally felt like I was in Oregon. Passed a ton of friendly older hikers and kept up my pace. I skipped down to the trail and met gb for lunch. We talked about how bad we smell. If I look down and smell my shoulders where my backpack strap sits, the stench is real. I compared it to the smell of sour pickles.

First views in Oregon.  

Oregon views during lunch.  

Trail marker.  

Then it was just a few miles to camp. Today was a small mileage day but it's ok. We set up camp off a dirt road. My food bag is actually almost gone! Usually I have so much food leftover but I think I packed well this time yay. We talked about Canada and stuff. I want to be done by the 20 and want to up our mileage but I don't want to make gb feel rushed. We would like to reach the border together. It'd be sad to split up again. We def have a routine down now and it's been really fun hiking together these last few weeks. We will just have to play it by ear. We can't wait to get to town tomorrow!

DAY 114: MILE 1658 TO 1682.8

The view where we got water.   

We finished the rest of the climb in the morning. We had to get water at a very slow spring so it took awhile and it was chilly. The weather today was unlike what we've been in for a long time. There were lots of fast moving clouds and the wind chill made me cold. I ended up having to pull out my jacket and gloves. The views overlooking the ridge was so pretty. I think I've been getting hiker hunger. Or my eating schedule is just all over the place. Sometimes I skip dinner meals and just eat candy or Nutella bc I'm not hungry since we ate a big lunch at a restaurant. But then I wake up starving and eat all my snacks before lunch and am still hungry. I had to eat a bunch today around 11 before I could keep hiking. We had many random climbs that brought out pace down and finally made it to lunch quite late. Gb found a nice spot but it always gets chilly in shade now. I took a quick break and was off.

Sunrise with amazing clouds.  

I've been texting back and forth with the hansons who live in Medford. We've been coordinating details on when we get into Ashland. We have decided to take up their offer on staying with them in Medford. Amye or Lori will come pick us up near the trail head. I can't wait to see them!! It'll be my first familiar faces in almost four months!! I was thinking how I'm also grateful gb is my hiking partner. I just know that he will be respectful wherever I take him haha. 

More clouds. 

And more.  

I reach the last water source before camp and tons of others are staying there. I wait for gb and see what he wants to do. It very windy and cold. It's a steep drop down to the water that is a slow trickle w sandy water. We decide to push for the next two miles sticking w our original plan and getting to camp at eight. I get there first and set up near some other hikers who are already sleeping. Gb then comes and tries finding another place so he doesn't wake the others. I guess I should've thought about that. It's our first night not camping together, how strange. Tomorrow is the border and we will probably be the first ones to reach it. Last night camping in California. What an interesting and great feeling.

Reminds me of home!